If you travel deep inside your TV, past the programs with fat cops struggling over chainlink fences, beyond Joan Rivers hustling hideous jewellery, further even than the Mexican game shows, you'll come to a vein of really bad stuff: cable TV movies. One of them, From Dusk Till Dawn 2: Texas Blood Money, to be precise, even starred FHM's cover girl, Tiffani Thiessen, racing through the Texas desert trying to slaughter leather-clad vampires.
Since then, the 26-year-old former star of Saved by the Bell and Beverly Hills 90210 has changed the color of her hair, dropped the "Amber" from her name and made another movie: Shriek if You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th. Unfortunately, Miramax had the same idea, got their parody — Scary Movie — to the screen first, broke box-office records and left Shriek high and dry. "Believe it or not, we made our film before Scary Movie," says Tiffani. "Our movie had a lower budget and we got beat to the punch by them. That's the story."
You played the prude Kelly Kapowski on Saved by the Bell and the resident bitch Valerie Malone on Beverly Hills 90210. Which is closest to the real Tiffani?
Neither. I was never clean, prissy and perfect like Kelly, and I was never a pot-smoking slut like Valerie. Kelly was the cheerleader and the perfect girl next door, and being that I grew up in the business, I never went to school. I was never a cheerleader. I never went to the prom. I didn't have any of those experiences.
Do you ever get mistaken for other celebrities in public?
Yeah, Yasmine Bleeth. I went to Toronto to film a movie. I was working nights and was really tired and really pissed because those little computer hotel keys never worked in the door. It was like the ninth time I went up to my room, so I had to go downstairs and get a new key. The lobby clerk looked at me and said, "I'm so sorry, Miss Bleeth," and I was like, "OK, you know what? This isn't the time to be doing that."
Have you ever had a guy send you a naked picture and ask for a date?
Yes. It was a pro baseball player who sent me his picture. I'm not going to name him because that's not fair, but let's just say he's one of the top baseball players.
Did he also send a baseball card?
No, just a picture. He desperately wanted to go out with me, and I thought it was a big compliment... very sweet. But at the time, I was seeing somebody.
Would you have gone out with him if you weren't seeing anyone?
If I wasn't seeing anyone, yes, I probably would have.
Do you ever hang your head in shame when you see old episodes of Saved by the Bell?
Yeah, it just makes me cringe. How I wore my hair like that — there was an amazing amount of Aqua Net in my bangs! Those tight biker shorts — what was I thinking? Of course, I didn't dress myself, but it's pretty embarrassing.
What's the worst thing your parents ever caught you doing?
How did that go down?
Really badly. It was my mom and she was just so upset. I don't think she's forgiven me to this day. I was 16 and still living at home. I learned how to smoke from Mark-Paul Gosselaar on Saved by the Bell. He's the one who taught me, and we smoked together. I think my mom knew we were smoking together when we were working, so I knew I couldn't really lie myself out of it.
Were you sent to your room?
No, I just remember her getting really upset and then I think it was maybe two days later that I moved out. So even if she'd wanted to punish me, I don't think she could have. But it's all Mark-Paul's fault. I blame it on him.
We just did a big lingerie issue. What's in your lingerie drawer?
I love to shop for lingerie! My drawer for my lingerie is probably as big as my drawer for sweats and jeans. It's really huge.
What's your favorite piece?
I've bought some of the most expensive lingerie in downtown Tenerife on the Canary Islands. Sometimes I'm afraid to wear them because they're so beautiful and sooo expensive
Hmm. Tell us more...
I have one piece that's completely black lace that's just gorgeous: a one-piece G-string kind of thing. And then I have a lot of bras and thongs that can go together. One is bright cranberry red and another one is a green color that just looks great against olive skin. And another navy blue one, which I love to wear with jeans.
Howard Stern once said you have the best breasts in Hollywood. What do you make of that?
Really? Wow! Well, being that Howard Stern has seen a lot of breasts, I take that as a huge compliment. I appreciate my breasts, yes. I think they're definitely one of my favorite things on my body.
They certainly get a lot of attention. Do you think people focus on them too much?
No, I think I have the type of body that even though I feel I do have somewhat big breasts, it doesn't show as much because I'm not the thin, waify kind of thing most women are today. I find myself more voluptuous. So I think it evens out with my hips and my shoulders and things like that. Even though people do stare, I don't think my chest is as noticeable as Pamela Anderson's. Since she is so tiny, it makes her boobs look even bigger.
When was the last time you received a mortifying hickey?
I remember getting one from my first boyfriend, but it was pretty small. But because I was on TV and I was always in the public eye, I was very careful about stuff like that. If I got the urge to make out with somebody, like my boyfriend, I would never go to the point of hickeys. And hickeys to me are, actually — what's the point?
How did your current beau win your heart?
Well, we were on set and he was eating chicken. I think it was a combination of a lot of other things that I found attractive about him, because if it had been somebody else with greasy chicken hands, I'd probably puke. But on him, just seeing somebody who I found very sexy, eating with his fingers... it was pretty damn sexy.
So he won your heart by way of fried chicken?
No, it was just regular baked chicken.